AMELIA BEDELIA RUINS HER MARRIAGE

Amelia Bedelia had just come home
After a long day of working for Mr. and Mrs. Rogers.
She was certainly tired;
After all,
She had dressed the turkey,
Dusted the furniture
And played a game of baseball
All in one day!

When she opened the door,
She was surprised to find
Mr. Bedelia home.
“Why aren’t you at your shift at the turbines?”
Amelia asked.
“Sit down; we need to talk.”
Mr. Bedelia sounded very upset.

“What happened? Were you fired?”
“I thought I told you to sit down. Now take a seat.”
Right as rain, Amelia picked up the nearest chair
And held it tight in her arms.
“You dumb sow, that’s not what I meant at all!
This is exactly what I’m –“
But Mr. Bedelia trailed off,
Rubbing his forehead with his hand.

“I’m just, I’m tired, Amelia.”
“Then take a nap!”
She suggested,
Trying to allay her husband’s sour mood.
“Not physically – goddamnit, Amelia, you know what I’m saying, it’s –
it’s all these games you play!”
“Then I’ll get rid of them!”
Amelia said,
“Checkers, mancala,
Whatever’s giving you the most worry, I’ll –“
With alarming speed,
Mr. Bedelia raised his hand to strike,
But brought it down slowly
In service of a promise he made to himself ten years ago.
A promise not to ever hit a woman again.

“Why do you do this to me, Amelia?
Why do you get me so mad I could cry?”
“But all I do is love you.”
Amelia said,
Her eyes welling with emotion.
“Here, let me make you a lemon meringue pie,
Let me just –“
“It’s not going to work this time, Amelia.
You can’t just make a pie to turn it better;
Not this time.”
His spiny frame sagged with age.

“I used to think it was cute;
measuring the height of two cups of rice,
heating the soup inside the can,
driving –
but after a while,
It stopped being funny.
After a while,
It just made me sad.”
Mr. Bedelia frowned a mighty frown.

“I’ve called your Cousin Alcolu –
If you like, you can stay with him.”
“Please, please don’t go!
I’ll, it was the pies, wasn’t it!
I’ll start making you more, I’ll –“
“I’m sorry. I just can’t live in this place anymore.”
“Then we’ll buy a new house!
We can move!”
Mr. Bedelia just shook his head,
Refusing to let his tears show.
The door swung shut with a hollow, empty sound.

Crestfallen,
Amelia made her way to the back yard
Where she beat a deceased horse with a large wooden stick.